Two, Four, Six, Eight!

I met Scott at the beginning of my grade seven year, and we quickly became good friends. We would get kicked out of class at the same time, and then walk up and down the halls goofing off. Or we would walk to Wendy's at lunchtime and grab some burgers before high-tailing it back to school so we weren't late to class. He even came with my and my dad for aviation ground school because he said he wanted "to get every license he could," including his pilot's. Well, we hung out a lot during high school, but then I went to boarding school in Washington for my senior year. After that, it was off to Tennessee for college. We ended up growing somewhat apart, with neither of us making a lot of effort to stay in touch. I don't think either of us were alarmed, it was just something that happened.

In the summer of 2008, I was back home until college resumed in August. I planned on meeting up with Scott, because I hadn't seen him in something like a year and a half, and I wanted to catch up. Then one morning, I flipped open my laptop. Scott had been killed in a horrific motorcycle accident. Immediately, I was shocked into the realization that I would never see my buddy again. Our friendship was instantly ripped to bits. I think what made this especially hard for me was the fact that, while we had known each other a long time, I hadn't really told Scott how much he meant to me as a friend. I would never get the chance to.

Scott's death was painful for me, but out of it grew something beautiful. While Scott's death took away my chance to express my thanks for his friendship, it also gave me thousands of new chances. His passing made me realize how many people in my life are constantly making a positive impact on me, and how few of them are ever thanked for it. As a result, I've thought long and hard about these opportunities, and how I can make the most of them.

During the spring break of my sophomore year in college, two of my sisters and I took a long-overdue trip to New England. One day, we traveled all the way up Cape Cod. On the way back, we decided to do something special. We held three simultaneous memorial services for ourselves, right there in the car. Before our tiny audience, we each waxed eloquent about the others' merits, accomplishments, achievements, as well as (most importantly) what they meant to us. I will always remember what a meaningful, eye-opening time it was. I'm sure my sisters will agree.

You see, I believe that there are incredible possibilities right at our fingertips. Thousands upon thousands of human beings are within each individual's sphere of influence, and if we work at cultivating this potential, there is no telling what we might be able to achieve. Appreciation is key. Simple affirmation of a person's positive abilities and tendencies makes them want to continue doing good. Expressing your love and thankfulness of another individual causes them to be uplifted and proactive in doing the same to others.

Proverbs 15:1 tells us that "a gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger." It is understandable that we all lash out at others because of the stresses and complications of everyday life, but we are called to something higher. We are to be beacons of light for everyone to see, shining outward and spilling God's love on the whole world.

I will be the first to admit that I all too often fall short of this goal, but Jesus' commandment in Matthew 7:12 is clear: "So in everything, do to others as you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets." Ever since I can remember, I have had a tendency to rely on verbal affirmation. I seek it out, I want it, and I nearly ask for it at every turn. I believe it is God's wish for me to look outside myself, and to spend more time appreciating others than ensuring I am appreciated. After all, that's when I am at my happiest.

All around me, I often see evidences of people caring for, helping, and affirming one another. I want in, and I want more people in with me. I long for the day that, through God's grace, everyone everywhere can be in a constant state of appreciation for those around them, because that really would be heaven. It's going to be much more about relationships than having wings anyway. Besides, I still have a few things to say to Scott.